Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
