careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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