what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize