return my video game
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Do vagina's smell?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
