Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
