Dual....:-)
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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