would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
