Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Randomize
