I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I had to cum in my sink.
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