Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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