I love black thongs
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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