just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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