this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
