so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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