I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
