He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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