what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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