Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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