Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
