Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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