epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
