Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
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