Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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