But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize