i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
we're so committed to being not committed
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
