I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
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