soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
