that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
my vag is so smooth its legendary
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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