Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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