U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Randomize
