problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
