Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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