I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
