these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You took a bar mat shot.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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