There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
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