I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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