the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
