How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
