Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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