why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
