I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
