he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
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