If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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