New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
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