Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I could make wine with my vomit
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
Randomize
