The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
if i died would you start the facebook group?
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
where does the pee come out of this thing
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Randomize