the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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