You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
