found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
