I wanna passion pit in your ass
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize
