Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
