how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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