just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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